You Don't Hold The Keys to Their Happiness, Mom
Hey mama...
Today... you woke up late, the breakfast is being thrown around the table, the kids are half dressed and you're rushing out the door to school.
There is toilet paper all over the bathroom, bedrooms that were cleaned just yesterday look like they haven't seen the light of day in years, and somehow they can't find their underwear. When was the last time they even wore them?
You don't get it, last night they went to sleep peacefully. You even stared at them for a few extra minutes thinking, "I can't believe I created this beauty, I'll never yell at them again... "
Aren't they absolutely perfect when they're sleeping?
What the hell happened this morning?
Chaos. Screaming. Fighting. Arguing. Where's my stuff!? He touched me. He got more milk than I did! I need field trip money! Where is my uniform?! Why won't the baby stop screaming?
Talk about going from one extreme to the other.
One of those days the car is almost lifted off the ground from screeching out of the driveway so quickly.
One of those days it takes everything you have to hold it together and not scream at the top of your lungs no matter who around you is looking.
The kids are now in the back laughing, chattering, and completely oblivious to the fact that you feel like this morning would make even the soberest (is that a word) of people, reach for a drink. WHEW.
It was a craze, a whirlwind, and chaos.
It was not peaceful.
It was stressful. It was annoying. It was straight up ridiculous.
Breaking up the thoughts of the morning, you realize they didn't brush their teeth this morning.
How many times can you forget before they get a cavity because this definitely isn't the first time. Two-year-olds can brush their own teeth, right? You think you saw a toothbrush in his mouth...
Good enough.
They get off to school safely and with smiles as usual. When they're leaving the car they turn back and yell "I LOVE YOU MOM" and BOOM.
WHAT? Were they even present this morning? Surely the neighbors heard you yelling, how could the kids not hear?
Now you're absolutely certain they don't even listen to you.
Here's what it comes down to...
THEY DON'T CARE.
They really don't.
They don't care how fast life seems to move. They don't care about the mess. They don't understand the stress the same way you do. They don't care about the noise. They don't care about the stuff. They don't care about the rush, they don't care about any of it.
Well great, then what do they care about?
They care about having loving parents and family around them. They care about security, feeling safe, having fun and feeling loved.
They can laugh on a dime because they don't worry about the petty things. Heck, they hardly worry about anything. Why should they?
You are the perfect person for them. The one that gives them wings. You give them security and the confidence to navigate life. They are content.
We can learn so much from these little teachers.
MAMA. Listen. I've got these days, more than I like to admit. We feel like we're spinning in a million directions, holding the keys to everybody's happiness, relax.
We're not. Just by being you, being present, and being the support for those little ones, you are fulfilling a magnificent role.
Everything is perfect.
Step back, smile, and be grateful for today. Try and laugh at the ridiculousness of the life around you and don't try and control it so hard. (Perhaps even cheers to it!)
Breathe. Make the time to love and laugh. They're only little once, and when they're big... maybe it'll be a bit easier, but for now. This is the good stuff. Be present, and smile. You've created an absolute masterpiece, now enjoy it.
Sending love and laughs, and even a dose of sanity ;)
XO Karin
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