“Hey girl!…” This is usually how the message starts out. And if you’re a woman on Instagram, who either is currently blogging or has posted once about working out, chances are you’ve received a direct message on Instagram that starts like that.
These messages are usually from other women or moms who are “coaches” for fitness groups and are trying to recruit you to join them. Or they’re selling R+F or Arbonne, or something else and want you to join their MLM.
In the messages I receive, a lot of them also go on to tell me how they’re lucky enough to have been able to quit their regular 9-5 job.
They go on to say they happily work from home with their kids and have flexible schedules, all while earning a fantastic income.
It always leads to the perfect pitch based on the assumption that I too need to do the same.
They tell me I seem like the perfect candidate to join them so I too can quit my 9-5 and be able to raise my kids at home.
I know how hard it must be to reach out to a complete stranger in a sales pitch...
But it's not for me.
I can’t imagine doing that because I’m not that type of personality, but kudos to you for putting yourself out there.
It’s not the cold-messaging I have a problem with, it's the assumption that everybody has to want what you want.
We all have to make money somehow and I’m not about to judge anyone for doing what they have to do to raise a family and make a living.
I think it’s great you’ve found something you love and are so passionate about that you want others to join you.
The problem I have is that because I’m a mom who works full time, it’s assumed that I want to quit my day job to stay home and raise my kids. It’s assumed that I don’t like my job, or that my job in some way, makes my parenting inadequate.
Are there times where I feel mom guilt? Absolutely. Is it because of my 9-5 job outside the home?
Maybe these women hate their previous jobs. Maybe they don’t have college degrees or didn’t want to go back to work after having kids – I don’t know. But I don’t relate to that.
I have a job I LOVE.
I guess most people can’t say that, but I can. I have flexibility. I can work from home with my kids when I want or have to. I can also work from anywhere there’s WiFi. But just because I work outside of the home, at a typical 9-5 job, does not mean that I want to quit it to join your MLM team so I can feel like a better mom.
My mom was a stay-at-home mom. She cleaned houses when we got older, but for the most part, she was always at home.
We're super lucky she stays home now to watch her grandkids. But even if I didn’t have my family to watch my children, it still wouldn’t be a reason for me to quit the job that I love, to stay home doing MLM work.
I’m not ripping on moms that do this. Truly, I’m not. I’m pissed that in every message I get like this, it states that I too can quit my job to stay at home and work with my kids.
Let me let you in on a little secret, I’ve worked at home with my kids, and ya know what?
It’s the hardest damn thing and I hate doing it.
I work harder when I have to stay home with my kids because it’s IMPOSSIBLE to get 8 hours’ worth of work done.
Someone needs juice, someone has to poop, the baby needs to nap, but the baby won’t nap, someone is screaming while you’re on a conference call because the baby took the remote, someone’s PB+J still has the crust on it.
Do that sound like fun?
Not for me.
My job allows me to go to my kid’s Christmas party, to leave work early to make it to their school activities, to be home with them when they’re sick.
I’m sorry that other jobs aren’t as flexible as mine, but please don’t mistake my 9-5 working mom status as guilt, because it’s not.
Stop assuming that I want to quit my job.
Feel free to hit me up with all your MLM work, truly, I don’t mind.
But please, don’t make me feel like less of a mother for loving my 9-5 job outside the house or assume that I’m looking to quit.
Back to work I go.
From a girl not ashamed to say she loves motherhood and loves her job.
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